Past experience: He who never makes mistakes never did anything that’s worthy.
– Miscellaneous fortune cookie
I already know…it’s been an extremely long time since I’ve
done any scribbling. But here I am after unwinding from the day and taking a
relaxing, hot shower.
I realize that writing for me is an outlet. Writing allows
me to get out my random thoughts and ponder over them before verbalizing
anything. It works for me.
I continue to make mistakes, I’m sure. The only bad thing
about making a mistake besides the mistake itself is not knowing if you’ve made
a mistake in the first place.
I clearly do not understand the male species or maybe I’ve
just run across anomalies. There have been several men in my life that I was
not able to figure out. Just when I think I got it, I obviously was off. Note
to self, don’t try to figure any of them out, it’s exhausting. Ain’t nobody got time for that.
I have friends that are married and what I’ve learned is
that up until now, I was not ready for what it takes to be in a relationship of
that stature. Note to self, don’t try to force a commitment when one or both
person(s) are not truly ready. Everyone handles life differently and prepares
for the chapters of life at differing speeds. Know your speed limit and stay in
your lane until the time is right to switch gears.
Failure does not define you unless you don’t get back up and
try again. Failure can lead to the most rewarding life that is more than you
ever imagined. Don’t believe me? Just watch.
Fear can be paralyzing and it grips even the fearless at
times. For me, fear manifests itself when I’m presented with an opportunity and
I have to make a decision. If you know me, you know I don’t do well with making
decisions most of the time. I will call my best friend and ask her “what do I want
to eat?” during the day. True story. So…when it comes to my career and stepping
into situations that will have lingering effects…it’s daunting and fear grips
me and holds me stagnant. I suppose I should just take the plunge, but the
“what ifs” creep in. Note to self? The struggle is real.
I make pop culture references throughout my conversations. I
just thought I’d throw that random tidbit in here, as if this entire page isn’t
riddled with randomness right now. My thoughts move a mile a minute.
I’m determined to get this body of mine back right. I’m on
it like 4 flats to the ground. Working out doesn’t happen for me unless I’m
accountable to someone else to be there at the gym. Motivation for me is
knowing someone else is depending on me being there and I show up.
I have about 3 novellas that I’ve started writing and have
not completed any of them. One of them I’ve been writing for over 6 years. Who
knows if any of them will ever be completed. *Kanye shrug*
All in all, I give this whole life thing a resounding 10. I
may not be where I want to be, but I continue to be blessed with what I need when
I need it. Shout out to J.C. for always being in my corner no matter what. I’m
so glad He doesn’t give up on me or cast me aside like man.
And now, I come to the end of my rambling. Maybe I wasn’t as
profound this go around, but I just felt the need to put thoughts to virtual
paper. Until next time…remember kids…
“there's heroes and there's legends. Heroes get
remembered but legends never die, follow your heart kid, and you'll never go
wrong.” – The Sandlot