Cloak of Invisibility

I can fake a smile. I can force a laugh. I can dance and play the part, if that’s what you ask. Give you all I am.  – “Human” by Christina Perri

Hide it so well

Hide it behind a wink and a smile

Hold it in, don’t let it out

Hold it all, stand big and tall

Played them all, you played the role so perfectly

Confidence, they say

She has it all

So cocky, so snooty, so mightier than thou 

Oh how so Queen of Sheba she is

So wrong they all were

As you cracked and crumbled inside your soul

Blinded by their sensibilities

Guided by the view of vanity

They failed to see that you were

Desperately clinging to their rose colored view

Plagued by what they didn’t see

In your eyes so clearly lay the world

For which you couldn’t please

Cloaked in your false imagery

Confidence and strength

Invisible to the untrained eye

Drained by insecurity

Haunted by insecurity

Anchored by insecurity

Drowned by…insecurity 

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Continua...No Flawless

I woke up like this. I woke up like this…

Sometimes I have epiphanies. And I think to myself, "whoa." It's like the universe in all its glorious wonder is spilling the secrets of life to me, understanding at my fingertips. Or maybe I'm just a little unhinged. *shrugs*

I can definitely be jealous. I felt it today. I'm not possessive, but I can be territorial. And it doesn't have to be anything major either, just a couple words could bring out the narrowing of the eyes. 

It's always weird when I feel jealousy snake it's way up my limbs, seeping into my mind, especially when it's behind someone I might be catching feelings for. Social media is the bane of relationships. I'm convinced. It can get you caught up so fast, you get whiplash and you're left in a daze, wondering what the heck just happened. I mean, it was just a stupid "like". It doesn't mean diddly squat. Except....for when it does mean something...right?  

I try not to assume anything because assumptions are pretty much a chunk of what's wrong with the world today and probably since the beginning of time, but it's so easy to slip into them. Jealousy is a hot headed mistress. How can you be jealous when something isn't even yours yet or not at all? It's soooo possible though. Perplexing, but so very possible.

I can definitely be stubborn. That's not always a bad thing. If someone tells you that you can't succeed, but you're just stubborn enough, you have the audacity to keep trying until you do. Well, that's not a bad use for stubborn. Having or showing dogged determination not to change one's attitude or position on something, especially when you don't want to change that attitude or position because of some sneaky little wisp of jealousy seductively whispering in your ear? Not so good. What a conundrum. 

Who really has it in them to look at the man in the mirror without cringing, even just a little bit?

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